Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore Page #2

WOMAN:
I don't know.

ALICE:
Neither do I.

I may kill myself before this day is over.

I can't believe I didn't sell this:

a homemade apron with a daisy on it.

Ma'am, I'd like to give this to you

as a present.

No, I couldn't.

Please, as a favor to me.

It would make me happy if you'd take it.

I certainly do appreciate it, and thank you.

You're welcome.

I'm sorry if I was rude before.

I've been kind of nervous lately.

Enjoy it.

I certainly will. You can just bank on that.

Bye.

Lock your door.

Hope it doesn't rain too hard.

I wish you weren't going.

There's room in the car.

Want to come with us?

Maybe I will.

Just leave Ken and the kids flat.

ALICE:
Wouldn't that be hysterical

if you got in the car and drove off with us?

And they never saw you again.

I can see their faces.

I wish I could.

ALICE:
Bye, Harold.

-Be a good boy, now.

-Okay.

I'll miss you, Allie.

I'll write to you.

No, you won't.

People say they will, but they don't.

Don't cry. That'll make me cry.

-Who's going to make me laugh?

-No. Don't, Bea.

Bye.

BEA:
Here, take this with you for luck.

ALICE:
Thank you.

BEA:
Take care of yourself.

ALICE:
I will.

-Goodbye.

-God bless you.

Thank you for everything.

Oh, God.

Are we there yet?

ALICE:
Don't look back.

You'll turn into a pillar of sh*t.

TOMMY:
The whole state is sh*t.

ALICE:
Don't talk dirty, Tommy.

How may times do I have to tell you?

Give me a potato chip.

Take this off my hand.

Mom, I feel sick.

-What do you mean?

-Like I might throw up.

ALICE:
You want me to pull over?

No, I'll tell you when I feel it coming.

TOMMY:
Mom, I feel it coming.

ALICE:
Okay.

All right. Get the door open.

ALICE:
Stick your head out the window.

TOMMY:
It's all right.

ALICE:
You don't want me to stop?

TOMMY:
No.

I feel it again.

Okay. All right, honey.

Just hold on. Aim it out the door.

All right. No, I'm all right.

ALICE:
You don't want me to stop?

TOMMY:
No. We'll get to Monterey sooner.

Mom, are we in Arizona yet?

If you ask me that one more time,

I'll beat you to death.

Just sit back there, relax, and enjoy life.

-Life is short.

-So are you.

-Mom, I'm bored.

-So am I!

What do you want from me, card tricks?

We should be in Phoenix

in about half an hour.

And then we'll,

as my Aunt June used to say...

"get gussied up and

go to a swanky place to eat." How's that?

What?

I said we's gonna go out

amongst them tonight.

What?

What do you mean, what?

What are you, Helen Keller?

I said, try and look decent.

We'll go out and have a good dinner.

-I don't care.

-You're annoying me.

Is this where you're gonna look for a job?

I got to get a new hairdo tomorrow

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