Adventureland Page #3

people are getting ripped off.

Yeah, yeah, Trotsky,

let's get you a booth.

So your life must be utter sh*t,

or you wouldn't be here.

I was supposed to go to Europe,

but my family has money problems.

Wait till your parents start

making you pay rent.

My dad even makes me pay utilities.

I don't want...

I catch the paper boy

But things don't really change

I'm standing in the wind

But I never wave bye-bye

But I try

I try

Hey, litterbug! In the clown mouth!

Okay, we have a winner.

It's the purple horse.

Green's in 2nd. Yellow's 3rd.

Congratulations.

Here you go. You can have that.

-Hey, James?

- Yeah?

You think you can maybe, you know,

take it up a notch?

Yeah, I know. Maybe I'm not

the right guy to run this game.

I really... I think I should probably be

on the rides department.

No. No, no, no.

You're more of a game guy.

-No, you're very... You're very gamey.

-Yeah.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.

Have you ever seen

a horse race before?

Have you ever, like,

heard one on the radio?

Harness racing

or, like, the normal kind?

-That's a good question.

-It doesn't really matter.

Look, the Kentucky Derby.

Have you seen the Kentucky Derby?

The way they announce it on the radio,

and it's really...

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

"100, 200, 200, going..."

-That's an auction, sweetie.

-Right.

So don't...

Yeah, just get into it, you know?

Make it a show. Make it a performance.

You know what I mean?

That's what people come for.

So, let's take it to a 10.

All right, got faith in you, man.

Thank you.

-Take it to a 10. I like that.

-Okay.

Ladies and gentlemen,

put down your mint juleps.

Horses are all at the starting gate.

Okay, and they're off!

And Red bolts out of the gate,

taking an early lead!

But look out! Here comes Green,

issuing a challenge

from the outside lane.

Green runs well

on a muddy track, folks,

so today's conditions

give him a slight edge.

And Yellow is dead last!

What a disappointment after Yellow's

strong showing at Saratoga last spring.

Wait! Look out! Wait a second!

Out of nowhere,

Orange breaks ahead of the pack,

and now, in the backstretch,

Orange and Green.

Orange and Green,

and Orange takes it by a nose!

Green places and Red shows.

Please come to the window

to collect your winnings!

-What window? There's a window?

-No. No, there's not. Here you go.

Congratulations, sir.

I'm new.

Our original initiative rapidly got

all tangled up in the sale of arms.

And the sale of arms got tangled up...

Hey, why don't you call

one of your old friends?

I heard Danny's back in town. Or Pat?

And tell them I work as a carny?

No, thank you.

-Yo! Guy!

-Yeah?

-Give me five.

-Okay.

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