A Midsummer Night's Sex Comedy Page #2

- Come away with me.

- Where?

To the country. The cousin of my

best friend's wife is getting married.

- A few of us are gonna celebrate.

- Really?

- Is it all right if I called you Dulcy?

- (laughs) Yes. I'm just surprised.

Did you not know that I've had my eye

on you these last two weeks?

I've only been working here for five days.

I lose track.

You always seem so shy around me.

The nurses on the floor say you're fast.

- Me?

- I mean, I think you're handsome.

Come with me. We'll have a fabulous

weekend. We'll sun, swim and drink beer.

Naturally, I'll make sure

we have separate rooms.

We don't need separate rooms.

I'm sorry about this afternoon.

- It's not your fault. It's probably me.

- I don't know what's wrong with me.

What's wrong is that

we have a bad sex life.

- But why?

- Because we never sleep together now.

- But what went wrong?

- Don't ask me.

Everything seemed great till about a year

ago, then you just sort of cooled off.

I've apologised to you

about a hundred times.

You don't have to. I must have done

something to make you feel that way.

No. I can't explain it. I just started

having those moods and odd feelings.

And the annoying thing is

that I get tense and I can't relax

and the whole thing gets destroyed.

I know. It's become a chore.

Right. It's not the kind of thing that

should be hanging over our heads all day,

that we're gonna be in bed together.

- It's not fair to you.

- It's not fair to you either.

That's why today at the barn I tried

to do it quickly and get it over with...

I don't mean "get it over with"

in a horrible way.

I mean that... I don't know what else to do.

Adrian, I'm sorry.

- Come on, I'm sorry.

- It's OK.

Could you get me a headache tablet?

We should ask Maxwell.

He's a friend and a doctor.

God, no! I don't want everybody

to know our personal problems.

What about your cousin?

He's a philosopher.

Do geniuses have problems

with their sex lives?

(Adrian) Oh, please, don't bring it up!

(Andrew) I'm only kidding.

So who's he marrying anyhow?

What does she do?

Is she also a philosopher,

an astronomer or something?

(Adrian) She doesn't do anything.

I think that her family's in politics.

I believe her name is Ariel Weymouth.

(glass shatters)

Did you drop something?

Yeah, I dropped a glass.

I better get the broom and make sure

all the slivers are up off the floor.

(tinkling)

(Mendelssohn's "Symphony No.3

in A Minor")

(car approaches)

(Andrew) Hi! Hey, Maxwell!

Andrew, my goodness!

How are you? Be careful.

This is Dulcy. Andrew.

- Don't kill yourself. We just got here.

- Hello!

He delights in making impractical but...

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