Lassie

Lassie, come home!

All right, folks, it's moving day.

- I told you not to watch this crap.

- I like "Lassie".

Jennifer!

You'll thank me when you're older.

Jennifer! Breakfast, honey.

You better hurry.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

- I'm fine!

Matt! 2.30! We're going!

Steve, did you load

that brown suitcase?

It's under four suitcases.

- I put Jennifer's books in it for the trip.

- Why would you do that?

I'm sorry.

Honey...

- Last minute jitters.

- Me, too.

- Does this move make sense?

- Yes.

We're going to be living in the house

where Anne grew up.

I can handle that...

...I think.

Jennifer, how many kids

are there in the world?

- I don't know.

- Billions, OK?

- A quarter of those are kids, right?

- Yeah.

Well, that means...

...250 million kids

at about three presents a kid.

That means 750 million presents,

in one night, with one guy

and eight reindeer.

- Dad!

- What's going on?

- Nothing... The guy is a hoax.

- Mom!

Her name is Laura.

We've got a long drive

ahead of us, girl.

Matt, what do you say

we stop and get something to eat?

Hey, Matt!

- Matt!

- Look out!

What a mess!

I got it, here we go.

All right, people, back in your cars.

All right, load up.

Looks like we're moving.

Hey, Matt, look! It's Lassie!

Jennifer, there's no such thing.

First Santa Claus, now...

- Holy cow!

- See, I told you. It is Lassie!

- Jennifer...

- It's Lassie, Dad.

- Jennifer, don't touch a strange dog.

- It's hurt.

- Jen, he'll be fine. Come on.

- It's a she!

- Come on!

- We can't just leave her here.

- Steve...

- Honey, please!

She's all alone.

Matt, hop in.

Lumber's half-price, so the cost is

low, and there's no hassle for permits.

- Can I play the jukebox? I got money.

- No Paula Abdul or Janet Jackson.

- You're not going to eat that?

- I'm not hungry.

Then why did you order it?

- Look, it's Lassie, she's back!

- Jennifer, it's not Lassie.

- How do you know?

- Lassie doesn't exist.

Whatever doesn't exist

just followed us here.

- Can we keep her?

- Of course not.

Why?

It probably belongs to somebody,

and we're full enough as it is.

- There she is.

- How did you find us?

- Jen, be careful.

- See, she loves us.

She wants to be with us.

Sweetie, she doesn't really love us,

she just wants food.

- Kids are supposed to have dogs.

- Jennifer!

- It helps us grow up right.

- I think she's sweet.

- Honey, you too?

- It's weird enough as it is.

- Why not add a dog?

- Honey, come on!

- Why not?

- Please, Dad!

This is ridiculous.

Where would we put it?

How about the back seat?

Come on, let's take her.

Please, Dad!

- All right, the back seat.

- Yes!

Hey, Matt!

Hey, cut it out! Cut it out!

Get away from me.

I'm coming, I'm coming.

Move over.

- This dog stinks.

- Look who's talking!

I don't have fur!

Come here, Lassie.

Well, this is it.

- Franklin Falls.

- 148?

It's the country, pal.

There's room out here.

148? There's more people than that

in a supermarket.

- Matt!

- There's more people on a subway.

- You've never been on a subway.

- I know what they hold.

You took us to nowhere.

That's where we've moved to.

- Soon you'll like it here.

- I'll take the bus back to Baltimore.

- There's my grandkids!

- Grandpa!

- Hello, princess.

- I missed you, Grandpa.

I missed you, too, honey.

And how's my big fellow?

- Is that an earring you're wearing?

- Yeah.

- Hi, Len.

- Hello, Steve.

Len, I'd like you

to meet my wife, Laura.

- I'm glad to meet you, ma'am.

- It's a pleasure to finally meet you.

I can't tell you how good it is to have

these two youngsters back with me.

- What do we have here?

- That's our new dog.

Just a stray we picked up

on the side of the road.

Just a stray?

This is a beautiful dog.

- It's a fine pedigree, I bet you.

- See!

I guess you would like to see

the house before it gets dark.

- I'll get the truck so you can follow me.

- That's all right, I remember the way.

Thank you.

There you are. I'll see you tomorrow.

- See you then.

- Bye-bye, Grandpa.

- Good to see you, Matt.

- Bye, Grandpa.

Matt, all aboard.

All right, come on.

Wow, is that our farm?

It's beautiful!

No, sweetie, we're up the road.

Wouldn't you know, it's starting to rain.

No way, this is it?

Don't worry, it'll be better inside.

Wait, let me turn on the light.

Great. Doesn't work.

Here you go, sweetie.

Be careful, Matt.

There's a note.

What?

It's from Len.

"The electricity went down in a storm,

should be back in a couple of weeks."

"Sorry for the mess.

I tidied up the best I could. Len."

- So there's no TV?

- No, Matt, there's no TV.

That's means there's no MTV.

Oh, great, really great.

- Why don't we just kill ourselves?

- Matt...

Take my hand, sweetie.

Watch your step there.

Let's take a look upstairs.

This bed seems OK. We'll use sleeping

bags until we get the sheets unpacked.

- Why bother?

- You and I are going to unload the car.

- Hey, don't forget this.

- Great! No pavement!

What'll I do with this? What kind

of kid would want to live here?

It wasn't so bad for your mother!

- Could this be my room, Laura?

- I don't think anyone will fight you for it.

Yes!

Which room do you want, Matt?

Still raining.

- About what I said outside...

- Forget it, it was nothing.

No?

You know...

...after your mother died, I made a point

not to talk about her in front of you,

because I could see

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