It Takes Two

Back up! Back up!

Fans, it's the bottom of the ninth.

and the bases are loaded.

And guess who the orphans

have at bat!

That's right.

It's the home-run queen herself.

The Belter from the Shelter. Miss--

Amanda Lemmon!

-What?

-I'm going to kill you!

Didn't I tell you

not to play in that dress?

Come on, Diane!

I ain't going to hurt it.

It's time for your interview.

Drop the bat. Let's go!

Just let me smash

this ball downtown, okay?

All right. you got 10 seconds.

Otherwise, the game is going to be

called on account of bloodshed!

Come on, Frankie.

I got to go to Staten Island.

Staten Island?

What about camp?

You'll miss the bus!

I won't. It's just a look-see.

They're trying to place you

with the Butkises?!

So what if they are?

You ever met those people?

That family collects kids.

They'll take anybody.

Even rejects like you.

Shut up, Frankie!

At least I got an interview.

And Amanda Butkis steps to the plate.

-Come on. Hop in.

-It was a grand slam!

See if they want a little boy!

Me and her. Two for one.

What am I, on sale?

Get your own!

Staten Island, please.

You're out. We win!

Amanda didn't touch home plate!

You're a dead man, Frankie!

Okay, so...

...it's not Park Avenue.

You can't judge a book by the cover.

You don't want to

be an orphan forever.

-So adopt me, why don't you?

-They won't let me, on my salary.

Besides that, you deserve

a mother and a father.

So get a husband!

It's not like buying a car, you know!

I know. It's got to be that

''Can't eat, can't sleep...

...reach for the stars.

World Series'' kind of stuff, right?

A girl has her standards.

Well, I got mine. And I say.

let's blow off these people!

Gum.

Hat.

Other gum.

Look. I know these people

have a stupid name...

...but they really like kids.

Okay? So put on a smile.

Sell it, girl!

Why do I always got to wear a dress?

Because it makes you

look so pretty.

Oh, isn't she the most precious thing?

What a pretty little dress!

She's a honey! Look.

she's got your mother's smile.

And your father's sense of humor.

That's very funny!

Come on in!

Come in, sweetie!

Why, you'll love it in here!

It's going to be fabulous.

Callaway, huh?

Must be a real big shot.

You'd be surprised how big.

All this for her?

Welcome home, princess.

He forgot again, didn't he?

I'm afraid your father's

been unavoidably detained.

If it's any consolation...

...I know an old butler

who's mighty glad to see you.

I'm sorry, Vincenzo.

How terribly rude of me!

I'm very glad to see you too.

Thank you, honey.

I see you've been practicing.

Congratulations!

What's his excuse?

Your father? Well...

...he's preparing for your arrival

up at the summer house.

-Which one?

-Lake Minocqua.

But that's been closed for years.

He never goes there.

He does now.

Vincenzo, you big fat fibber!

What's going on?

My lips are sealed.

You mean it's a surprise?

You could put it that way.

It's a welcome home party for me!

I knew Daddy was up to something.

Alyssa, I didn't say--

I won't tell.

I've never had a surprise party

in my whole life!

Well, this'll certainly

be a surprise.

Come on, move it!

-I got 43.

-Me too. Guess who's missing?

Carmen, where's Amanda?

She's not coming.

Hey, slugger. What's up?

I'm not going to stupid camp.

I don't blame you.

Look at this place. It's a pigsty!

It'll take you a week

to make your bed.

Don't joke. I'm serious.

I'm not joking.

That's why I sent

the bus ahead without us.

Liar.

-How much you want to bet?

-Fifty bucks.

-Okay. so I didn't send the bus.

-Cough it up.

But I will.

Then we can sit here until

you tell me what's really wrong.

I'm not going

to stupid Butkis' either.

I was waiting for that one.

If they're the best I can do.

Frankie's right. I am a reject.

You're not a reject.

It's just that most people

want to adopt....

Babies.

I know.

This orphan stuff is

like growing up in a dog pound.

Everybody wants a puppy.

Just once. I'd like to sleep

in my own room.

Hey, come here a minute.

Listen to me.

You listening to me?

I'm going to find you the best home

in the entire world.

That's a promise.

You don't make promises, remember?

I didn't say I don't make promises.

I don't make promises I can't keep.

There's a big difference.

Now can we please go to camp?

Please?

But you still owe me $50.

Oh, Vincenzo, it's gorgeous!

I think this house is going

to be my favorite.

I remember many happy years here.

-There she is.

-Daddy!

Come over here, my little--

Wait a minute!

You're not Alyssa. She's little.

You're a foot taller than her.

It's me. Honest!

It is?

I've missed you.

I'm sorry I wasn't at the airport.

That's okay. I knew it had

to be something really important.

Like a party, maybe?

She knows?

I didn't say a thing!

Vincenzo didn't tell me.

I figured it out on my own.

I should have let you surprise me.

but I'm too excited.

You are?

It's still on, isn't it?

Of course it's still on, sweetheart.

But are we talking

about the same party?

Roger, she's darling!

I'd like you to meet a friend of mine.

Clarice Kensington.

Hello, Miss Kensington.

How do you do?

What a perfect little girl!

Roger, I'm absolutely smitten!

You and I are going

to be great friends.

Are you here for my party?

Your party?

Roger, don't tell me

you haven't told her?

Told me what?

Sweetheart, the party is not for--

Rate this script:4.0 / 2 votes