EuroTrip

Synopsis: Ohio high school student Scott Thomas is a good student and nice guy - albeit a little predictable - who is about to graduate and go into pre-med. He is unceremoniously dumped by his whorish girlfriend Fiona on graduation day. Among the people he turns to in his hour of despair is his German pen pal, Mike. Scott and Mike seem to have a special connection. After Mike makes advances to Scott now that he and Fiona are not seeing each other, Scott abruptly sends Mike a message saying he never wants to hear from him again. However, Scott learns shorty thereafter that Mike is actually a beautiful girl named Mieke. By this time, Mieke has blocked his messages. Thinking that Mieke is actually who he was meant to be with, Scott, impulsively for a change, decides to go to Berlin to be with her. Along for the ride is Scott's best friend, the girl crazy Cooper Harris. They manage only to get a flight into London, and thus have to make their way from London to Berlin. Along the way in Paris, they r
Genre: Comedy
Director(s): Jeff Schaffer, Alec Berg (co-director), David Mandel (co-director)
  2 nominations.
 
IMDB:
6.6
Metacritic:
45
R
Year:
2004
92 min
2,069 Views


Congratulations,

Hudson High Class of 2004.

There she is. Fiona!

Bye.

- Hey.

- Hey!

- Hey, you.

- Congratulations, graduate.

- Thanks, baby.

And congratulations to you, Cooper.

Aww. Thanks, baby!

- Nice try.

- All right.

- See you at Wade's party tonight?

- See you then.

So, it's just you and me

for the entire summer.

Next year you graduate, join me

at college. Just like we planned.

- Scott, we need to talk.

- Yeah? About what?

About me dumping you.

Huh?

There he is!

The graduate

and his beautiful girlfriend. OK?

Smile, you two!

- Action!

- Dad, Mom, Grandma...

Uncle Moke... uh...

I'm gonna need a minute here, OK?

What do you mean,

you're dumping me?

I just can't take all the lying

and cheating on each other anymore.

What are you talking about?

Sweetie, I never cheated on you.

I know. That's what makes this so hard.

You're looking good, you guys.

Scotty, it's not you.

It's me.

There I go, lying again.

No, it was you.

You're just so...

...predictable.

- Smile!

So, that's it.

Here's your letter jacket back.

Goodbye.

This isn't mine.

She's a keeper, huh?

Oh, wow.

Oh, my God.

Fiona!

Let's see that again.

Fiona!

- This is just so brutal.

And yet I can't look away.

Bert, play it again. Come on.

- Fiona!

- Bert, get out of here.

OK.See you.

All right. Stay black, Bert.

"Fiona!"

Mail, motherf***er!

Hey, I got one from Mieke.

"Happy Herzlichen."

Still writing that guy?

I thought that was for German class.

Yeah at first, but we're

actually becoming good friends.

He's a really cool guy.

"Dear Mieke, greetings

from your American pen pal."

Scotty, Girl Scouts have pen pals.

Listen to yourself, all right?

You met a "cool guy" on the "internet."

This is how these sexual predators work.

Next thing you know,

he'll want to "arrange a meeting"

where he will gas you,

stuff you in the back of his van,

and make a wind chime

out of your genitals.

Come on, let's go to Wade's.

All right.

Screw it. Let's go.

I'm not gonna let Fiona

ruin my graduation night.

Auf wiedersehen, Mieke.

- What's up, losers?

- What's up, Jenny?

What's up, dude?

Sorry to hear about Fiona.

She's a whore.

That's very sweet of you.

Thanks.

Enough Fiona talk. Look around.

There's gotta be 100 drunk girls.

We should try to have sex

with every one of 'em.

Hello? Mixed company?

What?

- I'm a girl!

- No, you're not.

- You're just a cool guy with long hair.

- So, where's your evil twin brother?

Jenny!

There he is.

Hey, Jamie.

In fine form, I see.

Why'd you get me

gin and tonic?

- I hate gin.

- You do?

You guys are the worst twins ever!

Chug! Chug!

- When are you guys taking off?

- Tomorrow morning.

Hey, Wade!

Great party, buddy.

Man, I am so excited!

A whole summer,

backpacking around Europe.

You should've come with us instead of

working for Dr. Dad, Scotty!

It's gonna be so awesome!

Yeah. I planned every detail of the trip

to maximize the fun!

You brought a guidebook to a party?

- Do you wanna see my itinerary?

- Do you wanna see my balls?

You guys decide where

you're gonna go first?

Paris! I can't wait.

Two years ago Nicky Jager's sister,

Debbie, met a wealthy French guy,

and spent a month sailing

the Mediterranean on his yacht.

Isn't that the most romantic

thing you've ever heard?

Stuck on a boat with a weird French guy?

That sounds a little gay.

It's not gay. I'm a girl.

- Kinda gay.

- A little gay.

I gotta piss like a pregnant woman.

Hey, listen up, everybody.

Gotta a little special thing

I'd like to do tonight.

Going to play

a little song for you

about the nastiest, freakiest

little sex puppet I know...

Fiona.

This one's for you, baby.

Happy anniversary.

" Scotty doesn't know

That Fiona and me

" Do it in my van every Sunday

" She tells him she's in church

But she doesn't go

" Still she's on her knees

And Scotty doesn't know

" Oh, Scotty doesn't know

" So don't tell Scotty

Scotty doesn't know

" Scotty doesn't know "

I hope we're just as popular

in college as we were in high school.

- We will be.

- I know.

Who needs more Chablis?

- Candy, wanna come with?

- No, I'll stay here.

Well, there's your R-rating

right there.

- Whoops!

Holy cow!

Oh, this isn't where

I parked my car!

" I can't believe

He's so trusting

" While I'm right behind you thrusting

" 'Cause Scotty doesn't know

Scotty doesn't know "

Cooper Harris, you're a pig!

Uh... Candy, you should

clean that off before you go.

Clean what off?

You got a little something on you.

- Where?

- Right there.

It's like a smudge,

or something.

Where?

It's like dirt, or something.

Just go like this.

Is it off?

No, keep rubbing it.

" I did it with her on his birthday

" Scotty doesn't know

Scotty doesn't know

" Scotty doesn't know

Scotty doesn't know

" Don't tell Scotty

Scotty doesn't know "

Mmm-hmm... mmm-hmm...

No, it's just not coming off.

What is it?

Maybe tree sap or something.

Try pinching it.

No, it's just not coming off.

I'll tell you what.

Lick your fingers,

get some saliva going.

Like this?

Yeah.

Again, not enough saliva.

- Is it off yet?

- Fine, I'll do it.

Come here.

Oh, my God! Candy!

Cooper!

Hey...

This isn't where I parked my car.

" Scotty doesn't know

Hey.

Scotty doesn't know!

Scotty doesn't know!

This band rocks!

- Yeah!

Mail, motherf***er!

Hey, Mieke.

"Dear Scott,

"I was very sad to hear about

Rate this script:5.0 / 1 vote

Alec Berg

Alec Berg is an American comedy writer, best known as a writer for the sitcom Seinfeld. He also co-wrote the screenplays for the films The Cat in the Hat, EuroTrip and The Dictator. In addition, Berg is an executive producer of and has directed numerous episodes of Larry David's Curb Your Enthusiasm, and also executive produces Silicon Valley and Barry.In the Seinfeld episode "The Face Painter," Berg's name is given to an attorney friend of Jerry's who gives Jerry some New York Rangers playoff tickets. When Jerry fails to thank Berg's character for the tickets, Berg does not offer Jerry tickets for another game that week. In that episode, Jerry jokes that Berg has a great "John Houseman name," pronouncing it jokingly in Houseman's accent. Berg is of Swedish descent. more…

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Submitted on August 05, 2018

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