Clerks

INT:
BEDROOM. EARLY-MORNING HOURS

A DOG sleeps on a neatly made bed.

A CLOCK reads twenty to six.

A SHELF OF BOOKS holds such classics as Dante's Inferno,

Beyond Good and Evil, The Catcher in the Rye, and The Dark

Knight Returns. A FRAMED DIPLOMA, dusty and unkempt, hangs

askew on the wall. A snapshot of a girl is stuck in the

corner, and a bra weighs one end down. A PHONE sits quietly

atop a bundle of laundry. It suddenly explodes with a

resounding ring-once, twice, three times. A CLOSET DOOR swings

open, and a half-clad figure falls out. THE PHONE rings yet

again, and a hand falls upon the receiver, yanking it off

the trash can, O.C. THE RUMPLED FIGURE lays with his back to

the camera, phone in hand.

FIGURE:

(groggily)

Hello... What?... No, I don't work

today... I'm playing hockey at two.

THE DOG yawns and shakes its head.

FIGURE (O.S.)

Why don't you call Randal?... Because

I'm f***ing tired... I just closed

last night...

(deep sigh)

Jesus... What time are you going to

come in?... Twelve... Be there be

twelve?... Swear...

A PICTURE OF A GIRL leans against a trophy. The picture is

decorated with a Play-Doh beard and mustache.

FIGURE (O.S.)

Swear you'll be in by twelve and

I'll do it... Twelve... Twelve or I

walk.

THE PHONE RECEIVER slams into the cradle. THE RUMPLED FIGURE

slowly sits up and remains motionless. He musses his hair

and stands.

THE DOG stands and wags its tail. A hand pats its head. The

Rumpled Figure lays down on the bed. We now see his face. It

is the face of DANTE and this is Dante's room; this is Dante's

life. DANTE grabs the dog and wrestles it.

DANTE:

Next time, I get the bed.

He releases the dog and sits up.

DANTE:

(exhausted)

Sh*t.

CUT TO:

INT:
BATHROOM. MINUTES LATER

A steaming shower fills the room. The dog licks water from

the toilet.

CUT TO:

INT:
KITCHEN. MINUTES LATER

A towel-dressed DANTE opens the fridge and peers inside. He

grabs a half-empty gallon of milk and closes the door.

CUT TO:

INT:
KITCHEN. SECONDS LATER

Chocolate milk mix is heaped into a tumbler. One scoop, two

scoops, three scoops, four scoops.

CUT TO:

INT:
BEDROOM. A MINUTE LATER

DANTE gulps his breakfast while feeling inside the closet

for some clothes. Some chocolate milk spills on the floor.

THE DOG laps at the small puddle of chocolate milk.

CUT TO:

INT:
HALLWAY. MINUTES LATER

DANTE'S feet are hastily covered. A hand grabs keys from

atop a VCR.

CUT TO:

EXT:
DRIVEWAY. MINUTES LATER

A car backs out of the driveway and speeds down the street.

CUT TO:

EXT:
CONVENIENCE STORE. MORNING

The car pulls up, with a screech. Feet descend to the ground

from the open door. Keys jam into a lock and pop it open.

CUT TO:

DANTE lifts the metal shutter revealing the door. He opens

it and grabs two bundles of papers, throwing them inside the

store.

CUT TO:

INT:
CONVENIENCE STORE. MORNING

A very dark room barely lit by the daylight. Suddenly, the

lights flick on, revealing the glorious interior of the

convenience store. THE CAT looks at DANTE as he passes the

camera quickly. THE PAPER BUNDLE is snapped open with a knife.

Newspapers slam into the appropriate racks. One rack remains

empty. A coffee filter is placed in a metal pot.

Ground coffee follows, and the mix is shoved into place in

the coffeemaker. The switch is flicked and the machine comes

to life. The empty newspaper rack with the heading ASBURY

PARK PRESS seems out of place among all the other stacks of

papers. DANTE rubs his chin and stares, puzzled. He rolls

his eyes as it occurs to him.

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