Spare Me Page #3

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BUZZ:

Clam it!

Millie is silent. Buzz gets up and approaches Zeus.

BUZZ:

Hey, rat. C'mere.

Zeus growls at Buzz as he comes nearer, then clamps onto his

sleeve and hangs from his arm, growling ferociously. In one

smooth motion, Buzz flings the rabid poodle through an open

window and into the night.

MILLIE:

Jerk.

She heads outside.

BUZZ:

Sit down.

Theo sits on the edge of the couch. Buzz puts out his hand.

Theo shakes it.

BUZZ:

Buzz Fazeli.

THEO:

Theo.

BUZZ:

I know your face, you're an up-and-comer.

You bowl on the tour.

THEO:

I'm not on the tour this year.

BUZZ:

(nods understandingly)

Need some advice, huh.

THEO:

Well, Mr. Fazeli, the Bowling Congress

says I'm a thorn in their side.

BUZZ:

(dismissive wave)

Don't worry about the Congress, they're

just a bunch of moralistic busy-bodies.

15 EXT. THEO'S CAR 15

Millie's furry slippers protrude from the driver's side door.

Zeus chews furiously on the yellow plastic 'Bowler On Board'

sign. She rifles through the contents of the overstuffed

glove compartment. She notices her dog.

MILLIE:

(under her breath)

Get that outta your mouth!

16 INT. BUZZ'S HOUSE, LIVING ROOM 16

THEO:

They suspended me.

BUZZ:

Why'd they suspend you?

Theo's eyes glaze over, the lights in the room dim, and Buzz

seems to recede into the far distance.

17 TV SCREEN - FLASHBACK17

In ultra-slow scan we see an image of two bowlers, one is

smiling cockily to off-screen fans and waving, the other is

Theo, his face filled with hate, winding up to smash the

other man in the head with his bowling ball.

THEO (VO)

It wasn't really my fault.

In the far background the hollow booming VOICE of a judge

delivers sentence.

JUDGE (VO)

The American Bowling Congress hereby

suspends Theo Maynard Skinner from all

professional bowling activities within

the jurisdiction of the American Bowling

Congress and its international co-

signers... The ball mashes into the

smirking mans head, causing it to snap

forward. The judge's gavel BANGS and the

crowd ROARS.

18 INT. BUZZ'S HOUSE, LIVING ROOM 18

Theo snaps out of it, the room lights come up, and Buzz leans

in.

BUZZ:

I got suspended when I was young, too. I

was pretty cocky in my day.

THEO:

They suspended me for 100 years.

BUZZ:

100 years!

(knits his brow)

THEO:

I can appeal in five. I was hoping you

could help me Mr. Fazeli.

BUZZ:

(uneasy)

What do you think I can do?

THEO:

(sweating slightly)

I need a sponsor to get my sanction card

back. Where I come from, you're the king.

BUZZ:

Sure, around here, any fat old bald guy

could be king. I'm nothing. It wouldn't

do any good for me to talk to the

Congress.

(briskly changing subject)

Hey, you thirsty? You like orange whips?

THEO:

I've never had orange whips, I'm from

Akron.

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