Robin Williams: Live on Broadway script
Synopsis: The fourth HBO stand-up special by Robin Williams.

You look like you've had a slight coma, but you're beautiful.

One guy say to you: "Baby, I want you to get your titts done

for me!"

Do it for me. Do it for your daddy man.

And you say:
"OK, daddy man!"

Than I want you to get your balls done for me, OK ?

I want you to get those big old basket balls.

So when you do the baywatch thingy, it's like...

Nothing drives a woman crazy like a big old Easter basket on

her bunny.

You go to the doctor...

Girls...

Payback's a bitch ! Go for it, girls !

'Cause you went through a hard time. This whole winter was so

bizzare.

Temperatures were like . It was fucking weird!

The weathermen are going:

"I don't fucking know what's going on!"

Let's just see what happens.

Flowers were like Anne Heche going: "I'm out, I'm in, I'm

out..."

I don't know when to go.

George came back from Japan and went: "I went to the Coyote

Conference"

- No, it's Kyoto. - That's a very good car.

George, walk away.

They say there's no global warming.

But right now the North Pole is a pool.

It is beyond global warming. At this point is cooking.

At in the middle of the country: "Is it hot enough for

you?"

No, I like sweat to be rolling down the crack of my ass like

Niagra.

I like my old man's titties to lactate, my man.

You see people in shorts and you're going: "Please, don't

wear those!"

Please, don't put those on!

If you go to South West Airline:

"You're not fat, you're horizontally challenged"

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Robin Williams

Robin McLaurin Williams was an American stand-up comedian and actor. Starting as a stand-up comedian in San Francisco and Los Angeles in the mid-1970s, he is credited with leading San Francisco's comedy renaissance. more…

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"Robin Williams: Live on Broadway" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2017. Web. 24 Nov. 2017. <http://www.scripts.com/script/robin_williams:_live_on_broadway_1112>.

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