House of 1000 Corpses Page #3

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CAPT. SPAULDING

Yes, I did... so don't you go stuffin'

any goddamn paper towels down that

hole. I just snaked the sh*t out of

that thing.

Spaulding SLIDES the KEY attached to a cow skull across the

counter. Stucky grabs it. Spaulding hangs on.

CAPT. SPAULDING

Ya hear me? You bust that crapper

and I'll beat your ass.

STUCKY:

I hear ya.

He lets go of the key.

EXT. CAPT. SPAULDING'S - NIGHT

From a STRANGER'S POV we watch through the window, Stucky

EXIT for the restroom.

Sheriff Huston finishes pumping his gas, gets in his cruiser

and drives off.

KARL (O.S.)

All clear. Let's go shopping.

RICH (O.S.)

Right.

From this POV we RACE across the highway towards the front

door of the MUSEUM.

SLAM! We BURST through the door.

INT. SPAULDING'S - SAME

The moment of impact. BOOM. The door SMASHES open.

Spaulding's head JERKS up to see: a masked gunman, KARL,

wearing a LEATHER S+M MASK.

Behind him stands a second gunman, RICH, wearing a rubber

CAVEMAN MASK.

CAPT. SPAULDING

Mary f***ing Moses. Get the f*** out

of here.

KARL:

Hold it, clowney. Keep your paws

where I can see 'em.

RICH:

Yeah, don't move or I'll blast a

hole the size of a Kansas City melon

through your ugly-ass Bozo face.

Spaulding obeys and raises his hands.

KARL:

Go get that other a**hole out of the

shitter and drag his ass back in

here.

RICH:

Right.

Rich exits.

CAPT. SPAULDING

Miserable little c*nts with guns. I

ought to jump right over this counter

and bash your f***ing balls in.

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