Enough Said Page #4

ALBERT:

I’m sorry about this. I swear I made a

dinner reservation.

EVA:

Oh. That’s okay.

(beat)

What about you? What do you do?

ALBERT:

I work at The American Library of

Cultural History.

EVA:

The what?

ALBERT:

Exactly. It’s basically a television

library.

EVA:

(concerned)

You watch a lot of TV.

ALBERT:

(smiles)

No, no. Television history. What’s on

now? I have no clue. I tried to watch a

Housewives of Idiot Town and I wanted to

jump off a building.

EVA:

I watched one of those shows with my

daughter once and I couldn’t believe it.

They had no brains. And they all had fake

cheekbones. And fake b*obs.

(beat)

You like fake b*obs?

ALBERT:

I like real b*obs.

EVA:

I got real b*obs.

ALBERT:

(awkward pause)

Well, that’s working out for us then.

ENOUGH SAID 14

INT. TRAGICALLY HIP RESTAURANT - LATER

They’re mid meal and haven’t run out of things to say. They

have to shout to be heard.

EVA:

How long have you been divorced?

ALBERT:

About four years.

EVA:

And was it mutual?

ALBERT:

(embarrassed)

Not really, no.

EVA:

Uh uh.

(beat)

And can I get her number?

ALBERT:

Of course.

EVA:

Imagine the time it would save.

ALBERT:

Sometimes I think we should all just wear

signs around our necks. Get it all out

there.

EVA:

What would yours say?

ALBERT:

I don’t know. I’m a slob? I have ear

hair?

EVA:

You know there’s ways to get rid of ear

hair.

ALBERT:

Fully aware. Taken care of.

EVA:

A slob, huh?

ENOUGH SAID 15

ALBERT:

Not the dirty, hoarder kind, just the

normal kind.

EVA:

Does your daughter live with you?

ALBERT:

Half the time.

EVA:

Does she mind your normal kind of mess?

ALBERT:

I’m not that bad. But both she and her

mother are very neat. They love that

store - Christ - the empty box store?

EVA:

The Container Store?

ALBERT:

A whole store that sells crap to put your

crap in so you can buy more crap.

EVA:

I love that store. I love crap!

ALBERT:

So did my ex wife. And she put it in very

flowery and overpriced boxes.

EVA:

They sell those in some manly designs,

you know.

ALBERT:

Manly designs?

EVA:

Yeah, browns. Little cowboys.

ALBERT:

Little cowboys? Well, if they did, my

wife would have bought them for me

because she tried very hard to

domesticate me.

EVA:

Living with someone else is not easy.

Peoples habits.

ENOUGH SAID 16

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