Almost Famous Page #4
WILLIAM:
They do?
ELAINE:
What's a "Narc?"
ANITA:
(bleeding for her brother)
A Narcotics Officer!
ELAINE:
Well what's wrong with that?
WILLIAM:
(ever the peacemaker)
Come on you guys. It's no big deal.
I'm 12. It's okay. She skipped me a
grade, it's okay. Big deal. I'm a
year younger. They're 13, I'm 12 --
(beat)
Aren't I?
Their silence is eloquent.
ELAINE:
(confessing, in a rush)
I also put you in first grade when you
were five and never told you.
WILLIAM:
(trembling)
So... I'm... how old?
A heavy quiet. She and his sister ignore him, as they now
debate the subject with each other.
ANITA:
You lied to him! You make such a big
deal about the truth and you lied!
ELAINE:
(that one hurts)
He never asked.
ANITA:
What -- like he's going to ask if he's
as old as he thinks he is? Don't you
realize, this is going to scar him
forever?
ELAINE:
Honey... sweetheart... don't be
Cleopatra. We have to be his mother
and his Dad.
ANITA:
You put too much pressure on him!
WILLIAM:
(apprehensive)
How... old...
ANITA:
And when he rebels in some strange and
odd way, don't blame me.
WILLIAM:
... am I?
ELAINE:
(matter of fact)
I skipped you an extra grade. You're
eleven.
WILLIAM:
(horrified, voice crackling)
ELEVEN?
He looks at his body, the information affects him physically.
New sounds come from way down deep inside. Mom now begins
speed-rapping, trying to stem the leak. She starts the car.
ELAINE:
So you skipped fifth grade. There's
too much padding In the grades. I
taught elementary school. 5th grade -
unnecessary. Nothing happens in the
5th grade. All Teachers know it, no
WILLIAM:
(still in shock)
E - leven.
ELAINE:
And you skipped kindergarten because I
taught it to you when you were four.
WILLIAM:
(still horrified, looking
at his body)
This explains... so much...
ANITA:
You've robbed him of an adolescence!
ELAINE:
Adolescence is a marketing tool.
ANITA:
He's got no "crowd"... no friends...
WILLIAM:
Okay!
Anita reaches out to her brother. With the compassion of a
saint, she offers this:
ANITA:
Honey, I know you were expecting
puberty. You're just going to have to
shine it on for a while.
Deeply embarrassed, William shrinks down in the seat. Mom
monitors his face constantly. She is raw and sincere... and
yes, inspiring:
ELAINE:
Who needs a "crowd?" You're unique. You're
two years ahead of everybody. Take those
extra years and do what you want. Go to
Europe for a year! Take a look around,
see what you like! Follow your dream!
You'll still be the youngest lawyer in the
country. Your own great grandfather
practiced law until he was 93. Your dad
was so proud of you. He knew you were a
pronominally accelerated child.
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"Almost Famous" Scripts.com. STANDS4 LLC, 2024. Web. 29 Mar. 2024. <https://www.scripts.com/script/almost_famous_298>.
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