A Night at the Roxbury Page #4

DOUG does a "tip your hat" motion.

STEVE:

And who do you think the guy was?

Girls still stone-faced.

DOUG:

Emilio Estevez.

STEVE:

The Mighty Duckman. Swear to God.

I was there.

DOUG:

(teasing)

Of course, you were. You're the

one who yelled the breakfast

clubber's name.

STEVE:

I was like -- 'Emilioooo!'

DOUG:

So, anyway... you guys want to

make out or what?

The girls stare at them.

CUT TO:

EXT. AM/PM MIN-MART GAS STATION - NIGHT

The guys pull up. Doug gets out and starts to pump gas.

DOUG:

Score some chippage. I'll meet

you in there.

Steve exits into the AM/PM. Doug notices a woman puttng

gas into her car. She feins a smile, looks away.

DOUG:

Hey!

Doug starts pulling the pump in and out of the gas

tank -- simulating copulation. She's repulsed.

CUT TO:

INT. AM/PM -- CONTINOUS ACTION

Steve looking at a bag of Pork Rinds. Doug comes up from

behind.

DOUG:

Hey, she's totally looking at you.

STEVE:

Who?

Doug motions toward the CASHIER. She snaps her gum and

is reading People magazine.

DOUG:

Ask her where the chips are.

STEVE:

But, I know where they are.

DOUG pushes him. Steve walks over to the Cashier.

STEVE:

Excuse me, I'm looking for the

potato chips. You know, chips

made out of potato.

CASHIER:

They're right behind you.

STEVE:

Wow, you really know what's going

on, don't you?

He turns away and pretends to look at the chips. Doug

gives him a thumbs up.

Richard Grieco enters the store and walks up to the

Cashier. She lights up, recognizing Grieco.

DOUG:

Steve, look.

Doug and Steve walk up to Grieco.

DOUG:

(trying to be cool)

Hey.

RICHARD GRIECO:

... Hey.

DOUG:

Remember us? We were at the

Roxbury.

STEVE:

(to Grieco)

We were outside?

Grieco turns to Cashier.

RICHARD GRIECO:

Could I get a pack of Marlboro

Lights and that 12-pack of

Trojans. Thanks.

Cashier rings it up, hands it to him.

CASHIER:

(obviously enamored)

Thanks.

Grieco exits, they all watch. Steve approaches Cashier.

STEVE:

Yeah, I think I'm gonna need a 12-

pack of Trojans over there.

CASHIER:

You know, they expire in two

years.

CUT TO:

EXT. GAS STATION - NIGHT

Doug and Steve watch Grieco's Ferrari drive off as they

sit on the car and eat Pork Rinds.

DOUG:

That nabob has got it going on.

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