The Coroner Page #2

JANE:

Then how about you arrange the undertaker?

CLINT:

Which one?

JANE:

(THE FIRST THAT SPRINGS TO MIND) Try Prince’s; they’re reliable.

CLINT:

Sure.

JANE:

And do me a favour – don’t talk to the press guy on the way up. I don’t want

our office passing comment. I’ve got a nine AM with the Devonshire

Undertaker’s Association so hopefully this’ll be the last but the papers’ll be

all over it.

CLINT:

Think this is another botched sea-burial?

JANE:

Lightning doesn’t strike thrice.

[JANE HEADS INTO THE TENT. CLINT SPOTS A

CAMERA FLASH FROM THE BLUFFS. HE TUCKS HIS

SHORTBOARD UNDER HIS ARM, LIFTS HIS CHIN

AND CUTS A BLUE STEEL FOR THE LONG-LENS

BEFORE WALKING OFF]

CUT TO:

EP2/SC7. INT. POLICE STATION. DAY 1. 08:56

DORA HORTON:

NSE DUTY OFFICER

[A TWITCHY DORA HORTON (27) WALKS INTO THE

POLICE STATION. SHE FIDDLES WITH HER BANGS

OUT OF NERVES. SHE HEADS UP TO THE NSE DUTY

OFFICER’S WINDOW]

DORA:

I’d like to report a missing person.

CUT TO:

EP2/SC8. INT. LIGHTHAVEN COUNCIL OFFICES. HALLWAY.

DAY 1. 09:
04

JANE:

[JANE HURRIES DOWN MARBLE FLOORS TOWARDS

MEETING ROOMS. SHE HAS IN HER HAND A

PRINTED OUT PAGE FROM THE STAR ONLINE.

SHE REACHES A SET OF DOORS UPON WHICH

HANGS THE SIGN “DEVONSHIRE UNDERTAKERS

ASSOCIATION EGM”. SHE PUSHES IN]

CUT TO:

EP2/SC9. INT. LIGHTHAVEN COUNCIL OFFICES.

CONFERENCE ROOM. DAY 1. 09:06

BILL, JANE, MRS BLACKSTONE, MR GRAVELLE, MR PRINCE

NSE UNDERTAKERS:

[IT IRRITATES JANE THAT BILL’S STARTED THE

MEETING WITHOUT HER. AMONGST THE

UNDERTAKERS ARE GRAVELLE, NOLAN PRINCE

(43) A DICKENSIAN FELLOW WITH A WHIFF OF THE

SHABBY, AND ETHEL BLACKSTONE (53) A DOUR

LADY WHO’S NOT FOR TURNING]

JANE:

Thanks for waiting.

BILL:

Punctuality is the politeness of kings. For those of you who don’t know her,

this is our Coroner, Jane Kennedy –

JANE:

I know everyone here, Bill. This is a problem –

[SHE PLACES THE PRINTOUT ON THE TABLE. THE

HEADLINE READS ANOTHER BODY WASHES UP ON

GREYROCK POINT]

JANE (CONT’D):

Three in a month. We need to talk about reforming the rules for sea-burials.

BILL:

I hope that you are not suggesting those present are lacking in their jobs?

JANE:

It’s possible.

PRINCE:

Sorry but everyone here takes a great deal of professional pride in their

work.

[MRS BLACKSTONE CLEARS HER THROAT]

GRAVELLE:

These botched sea-burials could easily come from undertakers outside of

your jurisdiction –

PRINCE:

On strong currents.

BLACKSTONE:

Why aren’t they being hauled to an emergency general meeting?

JANE:

It is a subject I’ve raised with the Coroner’s Society and it’s not just here

but we can’t ignore that it is here and something needs to be done about it.

Look, it’s not my job to tell people how they’re disposed of; if you want to

have a traditional sea-burial, I’m all for it. But what I won’t support is a

situation where unidentified bodies keep floating up on my patch as a

consequence of botched sea-burials. I can’t have it.

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